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Why Pain Can be Your Greatest Teacher

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

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‘There is purpose in pain’ – Anonymous

Things aren’t always as they seem.

Pain doesn’t always turn out to be how it feels, bad.

It can be our highest teacher, with the wisdom it unleashes guiding us more skilfully down high-results producing paths that better align us with who we really are and what we really need.

It may feel like pain pushes you into deficit in the immediate, but the net effect is often increased self-awareness, spiritual growth and higher potential for happiness.

So feel the pain, don’t ice over it – there are vital learnings revealed beneath difficult emotions – and those learnings will provide a soft cushion of intell you will bounce off upwards from, in the right direction – northwards, towards the sweet-spot of self-actualisation and a far greater sense gratitude on arrival there 🎯

So if you’re in the heat of struggle right now, keep going. Don’t fight it. Feel it, let it out and when you’re ready, get curious about what it’s teaching you and where it’s leading you.

If you’d like to springboard deeper into how that works, here’s a superb podcast episode I send new career and life coaching clients. Dr. Susan David, Ph.D. is one of the world’s leading management thinkers and an award-winning Harvard Medical School psychologist with a deep focus on the function of emotions. In this episode with the equally gifted Mark Groves, she discusses some of the narratives around emotions that we’ve been conditioned to pursue and the ways in which this is making us less healthy and contributing to a culture of toxic positivity.

Susan explains how we can show up for ourselves by ending the constant struggle between how we think we should feel, and how we actually feel and how we can harness our emotions as signals to use to our advantage to optimise happiness and success. Listen here.

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Want to learn more?

Book in a free discovery call to learn more about Life / Career Coaching or Corporate Success Masterclasses 🥂 www.melanie-pritchard.com

Why Difficult Emotions can be the Most Helpful of All

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

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‘Tough emotions are part of our contract for life. You don’t get a meaningful career or raise a family or leave the world a better place without stress and discomfort. Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life’ – Susan David, PhD

It’s one of life’s great ironies that true happiness and success often comes from having experienced the opposite – sadness, confusion, frustration, fear, heartbreak or loss.

Whether feeling victimised and advocating for change that benefits others, cue the suffragettes, dating people from different paths who may unlock something major unrealised within you despite judgment from others or having the courage to trust instincts within to shift path whether career, geographic, love, friendship or beyond – listening to and channelling uncomfortable emotions will often be your making.

Ironic, then, isn’t it, that we rail against the things in life that bring us discomfort whether changing careers, breaking up with someone we feel deep down isn’t quite right for us, having difficult conversations and sitting with discomfort. For it’s the uncomfortable emotions that come with these that are usually the great revealers, connecting us to our most authentic selves and our greatest unmet needs. Precisely the route to greater happiness and a big part of the coaching process!

What uncomfortable feelings do you avoid?

What would that discomfort say if it could speak?

What would you be willing to face if you knew it would be the making of you and feed great joy? Even if it took faith to sit in the space in between and – just – trust?

Suddenly it doesn’t seem quite so scary, does it?

What uncomfortable truths are you willing to sit with this week?

And what, in your wildest dreams, might be the best outcome of this?

🪁

If you’d like to upgrade your life or career and learn simple tools to optimise clarity, confidence, strategy and change, book in a free discovery call here:

www.melanie-pritchard.com

Top Tips to Avoid Burnout

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

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‘Burnout is what happens when you try to avoid being human for too long’ – Michael Gungor

The above may be a handy reminder in the intense run-up to Christmas..

There’s a very thin line between peak performance and burnout so it can hit you from behind and catch you quite off guard.

Subtle signs of burn-out that may mean you need to priorise rest include:

🫣 Even small requests make you feel overwhelmed
🫣 You have a ‘glass-half empty’ view about most things
🫣 You are snappy and impatient with others
🫣 You have fallen into old unhealthy patterns
🫣 You feel extra sensitive and take everything personally
🫣 You feel insecure about things you used to feel confident about
🫣 You find it hard to get excited about anything
🫣 Even something as small as what to have for lunch feels overwhelming

Here are a coupla questions to check-in with how you’re doing on the thriving to burnout scale and to minimise the risk of wipe-out:

🎅 What two things need to be prioritised today?
🎅 Can this work wait till tomorrow?
🎅 How will I feel about this in 6 months?
🎅 If my body could speak, what would it say it needs?
🎅 Who can help me with this?
🎅 What would I say to a best friend in my position?

I’m not advocating you sack off work that needs to be done, but working super hard at the cost of meaningful things in our lives isn’t something we generally regret on our death beds.. it’s usually missing out on the stuff working too hard brings.

And sadly being an employee makes you ultimately disposable.

So careful killing yourself in the process unless you love your work, feel valued and have goals that will truly fulfil you and that working super hard may expedite.

My brother once gave me good advice on a similar theme pre Uni. He said if getting a First means killing yourself, get a 2:1 and have fun.

And as someone staring a terminal diagnosis in the face, he was privy to intell most of us generally aren’t.

Life’s too short, health is wealth and ultimately nothing works if you don’t 🎄

There is Purpose in Pain: How to Find the Magic in Adversity

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

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There is purpose in pain.

If you’ve had a rough ride, it ain’t the end of your tale. Feel the pain, let it out and then dig deep, look for the learnings and good things will come.

Life is like a Super Mario game. You gotta decipher the learning on whatever level you’re on, no matter how hard, to progress to the next level. If you keep doing the same thing again n again you’ll stay stuck where you are.

Give in to low vibe energy and sit in a bog of victimhood (of course this is normal at times) and be prepared to stay stuck there.

If you’re really stuck in toxic emotions like anger, shame and envy, who can you talk to to break that impasse so you can bust upwards to survive and then thrive?

Even when you get through that, it can be hard to keep the faith at times that good things are coming your way so be your own cheerleader daily and champion yourself with positive language as you move through stress.

I regularly tell myself what I’d tell a best friend at those moments: ‘You’re doing really well, Mella, keep going’ or ‘It’s ok you’re feeling burnt-out, you’ve had a lot of change of late’.

Cos y’know what?

Language matters.

What you feed your brain matters.

Even if you don’t believe it, your subconscious mind believes anything you tell it if you feed it that regularly enough.

So repeat after me:

‘Amazing things are coming’ 💥

And wait for the tide to turn in your favour 🌊

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Want to learn more? Book in a free life / career coaching or corporate training discovery call to benefit from my 10% January discount and to optimise success before February is upon us! 🥂 www.melanie-pritchard.com.

3 Ways to Sex-Up A Cover Letter!

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

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“Seduce my mind and you can have my body, find my soul and I’m yours forever” – MD Waters

Can you guess the link between dating and careers?

I see average cover letters again and again. Just like attracting a crème de la crème mate, we need to up our game massively to attract top employers, stand out from the crowd and secure the top jobs.

This means hardcore seduction.

I’m talking KC level, evidence based seduction that wins High Court cases.

There should be nothing average about it.

If it’s not breath-taking, don’t send it.

It you know it’s not a 10 out of 10, keep drafting.

If you don’t know how, drop me a line.

Corporate seduction is my superpower!

Like anything in life, it’s easy when you have the magic formula.

To find out how I can help you uplevel your life or career, book a free discovery call here

Still unsure? Here’s what a recent client, Tina LePomme said: ‘‘I worked with Mel in 2022. She helped me redefine my career, think about my key priorities and supported me throughout the entire process all the way until I found the dream job. She is absolutely amazing, she’s incredibly resourceful, will go above and beyond to support you in any way she can and is very professional. I cannot recommend her enough”

LA Weekly: 10 Career Coaches to Follow in 2023

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

press womens la weekly 10 career coaches to follow

Whether your career is in its infancy or you’re ready to change paths, working with a passionate and expert career coach can make a big difference. Career development can be quite daunting and everyone can benefit from the guidance and support career coaches are meant to provide.

If you need help exploring careers paths, setting and achieving career goals, developing your skills, and finding new and better jobs, among many other things, working with a career coach will make things a lot easier. They have years of experience and a wealth of knowledge under their belt, it’s just a matter of finding the right fit for you.

Browse our list below to find the top 10 career coaches in 2023!

Buddhist Top Tip: How to Deal with Toxic People

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

A recent life coaching client and I discussed how to deal with toxic people who push boundaries, manipulate, gaslight and try to get a rise out of you.

 

We deduced that our responses should take a different form with toxic people..

 

Watch the short video from a heavenly buddhist monk here and see what you think…

Married to Trauma: Loving a Victim of Childhood Trauma

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

Adult survivors of childhood abandonment and complex trauma abound in our society. Theirs is a sad reality shrouded in the darkness of shame that keeps their experience locked away only to be known by their volcanic overreactions or quiet avoidance that are triggered by present-day cues. They are our sisters, fathers, spouses, etc. They live fenced in by crippling fear and loss of identity stolen at such a young age. They’ve developed and matured as we all do, driven by survival and attachment, the same instincts they came into the world with, the same instincts that gave them a fighting chance at survival. However, the other component necessary for reaching potential, the social environment, was not favorable. It seemed as if this third ingredient almost wanted their destruction from the very beginning as if they were not meant to be alive in the first place. This environment, or soil, if you will, would go on to nurture beliefs deep in the psyche of the individual. These beliefs would become infused with the person’s sense of self, and so they would live out those beliefs as if they had to. They would live out those beliefs in ever reinforcing and destructive consequences. Those consequences reinforce a dark world view and a sense of self-value that is worthless. They live in a reality that holds no possibility for hope. Each day they walk past choice and opportunity only to choose what is familiar.

Read the rest of this superb article here. There’s a surprisingly positive twist!

6 Surprising Signs of a Toxic Relationship

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard
There’s no class in high school on how to not be a shitty boyfriend or girlfriend. Sure, we get taught the biology of sex, the legal ins and outs of marriage, and maybe we read a few obscure love stories from the 19th century on how not to be an ass-face.

Without clear ideas from adults, what we’re left with is basically trial and error, and if you’re like most people, it’s mostly error.

Enter: a string of toxic relationships as we fumble through an already complex dating world.

One of the problems is that a lot of toxic relationship habits are baked into our culture. We worship romantic love—you know, that dizzying and irrational kind that somehow finds breaking china plates on the wall in a fit of tears somewhat endearing. And we scoff at practicality or unconventional sexualities.

Men and women are encouraged to objectify each other and to objectify their romantic relationships. Thus, our partners are often seen as achievements or prizes rather than someone to share mutual emotional support.

A lot of the self-help literature out there isn’t helpful either. And for most of us, mom and dad surely weren’t the best examples.

Read the rest of this excellent article on the 6 signs of a toxic relationship here.

The greatest gift you can give someone is your own personal development

Why Management Consulting Can Feel like a Toxic Relationship

Posted on by Melanie Pritchard

‘Management consulting is like a toxic relationship – you love the salary, status and perks, but you hate the intense workload, demanding clients, lack of work life balance and lack of praise’ – Career Coaching Consulting Client

Are you a management consultant, lawyer or professional who loves the highs of the job – the big pay check, the nice house and the social status but secretly hates the feeling of being stuck in the ‘corporate cage’ where you crave changing out of the ‘always on’ culture but love the big salary and feel trapped by a big mortgage and other liabilities?

Or maybe you’ve reached the pinnacle of your career, near Partnership, only to realise that all your efforts seem to count for nothing unless you hit whopping billable targets or you’re able to bring in new business.

Or maybe you simply don’t have the time to explore these niggling feelings and doubts – or you don’t know who you could talk to to discover alternatives that meet your wider needs?

Perhaps you’ve normalised feeling flat, frustrated or unfulfilled for so long that you’ve failed to notice the negative ripple effect your work is having on your mental health and your wider quality of life with family and friends?

Can you even imagine what it feels like not to have to be perfect every day at work, like you’re on a never-ending treadmill constantly fending off burn-out?

I get it – as a lawyer turned Career and Life Coach, I help smart, successful professionals working in high stress worlds design careers and lives they love – and much as your monkey mind may tell you this isn’t possible, I’m here to tell you it is!

Whether learning simple mindset mastery tricks to help reduce stress and optimise work life balance, learning how to develop boundaries and people please less, exploring career alternatives that thrive off your superb CV or managing wider life goals like love and relationships, I’m here for you.

It’s easy to boost hope and joy in life when you have the right tools and the space to explore what you really want, what your options are and how to reconnect with your strengths to strategise for change. It doesn’t have to be money or happiness – it can be both.

Check out a powerful example of one of many bright but frustrated career coaching clients I work with in the in the short video here.

What do you relate to?

What are your main pain-points?

And how committed to change are you in 2023?

If you’d like to explore how I can help you master your mind and re-design your career or personal life, drop me a message here for a free discovery call. Helping smart, successful professionals get unstuck fast is my superpower 🙂

Here’s what a recent legal client said:

‘Thank you so much for everything – I feel like you’re the best investment I made in myself in years. I feel much more connected to my true self and have more trust in myself than I have had in a long time. You have a real gift’

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