“Listen with curiosity. Speak with honesty. Act with integrity. The greatest problem with communication is we don’t listen to understand. We listen to reply. When we listen with curiosity, we don’t listen with the intent to reply. We listen for what’s behind the words” – Roy T Bennett 👂
Instead of assuming or judging, ask questions. Not just when the shit hits the fan but daily.
If there’s one thing I’ve learnt from delivering mental health and wellbeing workshops to boardrooms of all ages, stages and personalities, it’s that you never know what’s really going on beneath appearances. Some real life examples include:
👂 The burly builder with a phobia of tall buildings from watching someone fall from one years’ ago – cue colleague’s response: ‘Mate, I never would’ve thought someone like you’d struggled with that’
👂 The handsome legal partner who confessed to going to the doctor with aches n pains only to turn back around as he was about to leave the doctor’s office saying he was struggling with his mental health post move to a new law firm
👂 The Head of Dept who struggled with depression for years but managed to nail his role at work as far as his colleagues were concerned
👂 The charismatic corporate leader who struggled through a horrible divorce during Covid unbeknownst to his colleagues until he shared this during the workshop. They had no idea and were mortified they’d taken him at face value
👂 The bubbly manager keeping afloat whilst being the only remaining family member to support her schizophrenic brother. The weight she was carrying alone boggled all our minds
If there’d been more questions day to day, who knows what mayve become apparent sooner.
For instance, rather than a: ‘How was your weekend?’ and reply: ‘Not bad..’ – go further..
‘Why just not bad?’
Maybe you’ll hear: ‘Oh my wife’s not too well atm’.
Get curious: ‘Sorry to hear that. What’s going on there?’
Maybe you’ll hear something like: ‘She’s going through chemo’.
Those questions can change everything. They hold a mirror up to truth and bring space for connection between co-workers, lovers and friends.
So get curious more.
Listen to understand, not to respond.
It’s where the magic happens.
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Want to learn more? Book in a free life / career coaching or corporate training discovery call to optimise success before January is out! 🥂 www.melanie-pritchard.com.
